#ClaireMusings: women in society

Since becoming a father of a little girl, I see the world very different.  I see what society is telling our daughters, and who they would like to mold them to be.  It's sickening.  Women/girls are hated by society, and we buy into it like it's an actual reality.

Women are strong.  Women are tough.  Women are equal to men.  Those are not the statements that we hear in our culture.  We typically hear that women are property or are less than men.  It's just really disgusting.  It happens in The Church even more than I think we realize, but then again aren't wives supposed to submit to their husbands?  I mean it's like the ladies can't get empowered or see their worth from anywhere. I was so proud of my Pastor that past weekend when he said, "Women and men are equal, God created them from one another."   That seems like it should be common knowledge, but it's not and that's why I am so proud of that statement.

We have a Presidential candidate that has said some repulsive things about women. I mean, has said the most misogynistic things, and is leading in the polls.  IS LEADING, by a HUGE MARGIN!  We start to believe when we follow blindly.

Today I was scrolling down my Instagram feed and saw this little gem:

This is a local high-priced boutique in Amarillo Texas.  It's usually associated with fashion brands, but today the store just didn't choose wisely.  Just what I want to get my daughter for Back To School; socks with self-proclaiming  character flaws. Having my daughter wear these like a banner, telling the world that she's a brat or trashy... is well trashy. 

You can look any number of places and see how devalued our society from every angle tells our girls how to look, how to dress, and how little worth they have.  It's up to us, dads included, to make sure we don't let the world tell our daughters who/why they are, but we must fight against the grain to ensure our daughters have a platform that will propel them to their individual excellentness.  

#ClaireMusings: Why I am not teaching my daughter "modest is hottest"

Ten months or so ago I became a father to a precious little girl. Her name is Claire Jewel, and she's been getting me to thinking a lot.  I have started to see the world in a very different way than I think I did before she was born.  It's just some of what churches and Christian based organizations are teaching girls seems to be quite flawed.  When I say the Church, I am not talking about any one church but Christian culture in America.

One of those things is teaching our daughters that "Modest is Hottest." Looking at that, it looks like a great statement, and that we should teach our daughters that being modest is appropriate, but that's not what this is saying. This is not the purpose of this "cute" little rhyme in my opinion.

We live in a very sexualized world.  Women and girls face a world where their worth is put into how "pretty" "beautiful" "sexy" the package is, and how they get what they want based on looks and appearance. We live in a culture that says if a women isn't pretty, by a photoshopped standard in the latest women's magazine or fashion brand's latest advertising,  then she isn't valuable, and even farther, she isn't worth our time.

See I believe that the teaching that modest is hottest came from a very genuinely good place.  I can see someone using the culture of the world to sell modesty to little girls who are exposed to what the world is doing to women through images of perfection.  I can see it's origins.  I can see a counter-culture trying to make sense of the current culture.

My beef with modest is hottest is that it's STILL sexualizing women!  It says, you still need to be hot, but modest at the same time. I believe that the teaching modesty is important, but based on teaching girls the VALUE of themselves.  I think my daughter is valuable because she is, not because of what she looks like.  When you say modest is hottest it's cheapening the worth of her, her intelligence, her abilities, and her as a human.

You shouldn't fight fire with fire.  You should use the current culture as an example but not in agreement.  My daughter is valuable, not because of what she looks like, but because she was created by a God full of love! We may not have control over how the world works or how it portrays women and girls, but we do have the ability to provide truth in the midst of chaos.  We have to teach our daughters from as early as possible to value themselves and to be examples; while addressing and exposing what's going on around them at the same time.